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Okay, I know it sounds kinda stupid, so keep an open mind please...because just this week... mere days ago...I have finally come to terms with the fact that there isn't one thing left about me, my body, my personality, my psyche, my emotional state, not one thing that I still need to "fix"...that is not to say that everything about me is perfect in society's eyes...just in my own!
Yes, it's true! Today, I am perfectly and completely happy with myself....just as I am. The unfortunate part was that it took almost a full year of emotional "wandering" and feeling out of place before I realized that I was feeling lost because I had worked my entire life on improving myself....the self help books, the seminars, the counselors, the psychiatrists...now don't get me wrong....there were PLENTY of things that needed "fixing"...and I worked hard at it, I worked at it every single day...there was always something to work on. But for the past year I haven't been doing it, haven't been drawn to a self help book, haven't found the need to seek one out, haven't even really been doing my "angry writing" in my journal....but I have been feeling lost...lost because on one level of my life, I was feeling like I had "nothing to do"....like when you putter around the house not really with a goal in mind, not really accomplishing anything, just kinda...doing nothing....that's why the little voice in my head hasn't been pestering me. It been very confusing...until a friend helped me figure it out.
I was talking to her about how I was feeling a little lost, and a little bleary headed, and unable to truly focus, and I couldn't get a "hold" on what it was...and I said that I had found this book to help rediscover your creative spirit....and that it was enjoyable to read, and the pictures and projects were beautiful, but that it wasn't really fixing the problem....ding, ding, ding..... My wise and dear friend took a long deep cleansing breath and said to me, very slowly....perhaps it is because there is nothing left to fix. What? Huh? I don't understand? She very kindly said...of course you don't understand. She said, because your whole life, you have felt, there were things to be fixed....and there were...and you worked hard to fix them...and you did a great job....(she took another deep breath)...and you are done. she paused, and when she realized I was a bit speechless, she reiterated, in the very kind tone one uses to explain things to a child, who clearly is not understanding what is being said... You need to realize that you fixed everything you needed to, and you are done. There is nothing left to fix. Okay?
So I say, a bit in a daze, trying to grasp the gravity of what she just said to me and I say, "sure, okay...whatever you say"....and it took about thirty minutes, and three very 'coincidental' incidents that happened immediately after that, to get me to open my eyes. One being my horoscope..."Today you ultimately realize that your work on a large project is finally done"....that was it, no real details or anything, but perfectly clear to me..another was an inspirational video someone had sent me in my email but I hadn't had time to look at it until that day...where it stated in the very beginning that the main point of the journey was that we need to question the ‘general beliefs’ that we have conditioned ourselves to believe throughout our lives…one of them was basically that “I’m not good enough”…which I know is something we have all thought about some of the time….but I had conditioned myself to believe it all of the time, from the time I was a child...simply because I truly did have a great deal that needed to be learned and “fixed”….
It simply had never even occurred to me that at one point I would be “DONE”…. Until this week. And I am….done, that is…and I feel fantastic! It’s weird how when something perfectly sensible doesn’t even occur to you until someone else says it out loud…. I am very grateful to my friend. I am also very grateful to myself for getting it, and not denying it. I think that’s pretty huge as well!
So..onward!! Magical things are about to happen!!!
: )
I thought this was a wonderful and amusing artical...and I have thrown away alot of this stuff this year so far....
Performer, songwriter, and creativity consultant Christine Kane publishes her 'LiveCreative' weekly ezine with more than 4,000 subscribers. If you want to be the artist of your life and create authentic and lasting success, you can sign up for a FRE*E subscription to LiveCreative at www.christinekane.com.
WANT TO SEE HUNDREDS MORE ARTICLES LIKE THIS ONE?
See Christine's blog - Be Creative. Be Conscious. Be Courageous - at ChristineKane.com/blog.
56 Things You Can Toss Out Now
by Christine Kane
We hold onto our stuff for two reasons: Love or fear. We either love things. Or we fear letting them go. We cherish them and know they have value to us.
OR...
We fear that we'll need them someday. We fear that we wasted our money on them. We fear what others will think if we let them go. We even fear making the decision to release our mistakes, so we don't make any decision at all. Instead we passively hold onto stuff out of guilt.
Well, guess what?
When you begin to make choices from a place of LOVE and EXPANSION, then your world will change. Love is the clearest reason to do anything. If you don't love it, toss it. Give it away. Your abundance and energy will increase when you begin to live by love, and not by fear.
Here are 56 things you can toss out (or give away) right now...
1. All the hotel key cards you forgot to turn it when you checked out.
2. The doilies your Aunt Missy crocheted 45 years ago that got handed down to you.
3. CD's you haven't listened to in three years or more.
4. The boxes of cassettes you've been meaning to transfer to CD's.
5. The bread maker you haven't used since 2003.
6. Your wedding dress
NOTE: You can say you've been saving it for your daughter, but here are three signs that your daughter doesn't want to wear it: a] she's already married and wore her own dress, b] she's been roommates with a woman named Pat for nine years, or c] you don't have a daughter.
7. Credit card bills from 1995.
8. The Allen wrenches from every piece of IKEA furniture you ever assembled.
9. The jacket you spent way too much money on and never wore. NOTE: Keeping it around just to punish yourself for your bad choices is like going to parochial school all over again.
10. Every scratching post or toy your cat doesn't like. NOTE: Your cat didn't go to parochial school so there's no sense punishing him.
11. House plants you no longer love.
12. The stacks of O Magazine you swear you'll re-read.
13. Every little zippy bag that came with a Clinique purchase.
14. Every unopened perfume that came with a Clinique purchase.
15. Leftover scrunchies in case you grow your hair long again.
16. The "Cherries Jubilee" flavored lip balm that makes you nauseous.
17. Every single regretful lipstick color you bought on a whim. ("Cherries Jubilee" is probably there, too.)
18. Your last four cell phones and all their chargers and blue teeth.
19. Single socks.
20. The Spode Christmas plates and mugs you don't like. (Along with the Christmas bath towels and welcome mat.)
21. The framed posters you had in your college dorm room.
22. Old stereo wires.
NOTE: If your husband refuses to let go of any of these mysterious wires, try this: Put them (not him!) in a bin and label it "Random Cables and Wires." After two years, bring it out of storage and kindly note that no one has thought about it in two years. Ask if it would be okay to let go of half of them. Repeat process until all mysterious cables and wires are gone.
23. The nails, screws, anchors, and cup hooks rusting in the bottom of your tool chest.
24. Remote controls that don't remotely control anything you own.
25. Lamps, toasters, blenders, coffeemakers that no longer work.
26. The notion that you will ever be one of those moms that makes beautiful scrapbooks.
NOTE: Put your photos in boxes. No one will judge you.
27. Old blankets and linens you keep in case you suddenly have 27 sleepover guests.
28. College text books
29. Any boring decorative item that does little more than fill space.
30. Vases you don't love or use.
31. Candle holders you don't love or use.
32. Picture frames you don't love or use.
33. Class notes from college.
34. The idea that you have to save every piece of your children's artwork and school work because it might mean you don't love them if you don't.
35. The "good silver" you don't use that was passed down to you.
36. Old VHS movies
37. Unlabeled VHS tapes. (And don't waste your time watching them just in case.)
38. The stationary bike that got even more stationary after you got it.
39. The fabric pieces you've been collecting in case you ever become a quilter.
40. Flashlights that dimly light up only after you bang them over and over on your thigh.
41. Old keys that open some door somewhere in the past.
42. Suitcases you don't use.
43. Old computers.
44. Old stereos.
45. Promotional duffel bags with ugly logos and bad acronyms stitched all over them.
46. Anything that makes you say, "But I got such a good price on it!"
47. Anything that makes you say, "But I paid so much for it!"
48. Half-full cans of paint.
49. Extra baby items/Old baby items.
50. Record albums. NOTE: Don't spend your extra hours in a day trying to figure out if someone will buy them. Really. They won't.
51. Gifts you never liked.
52. All the cross-stitch, knitting, or sewing projects you never finished.
53. Any glassware or dinnerware that is a "memorabilia" item from proms or sororities or sports events.
54. Old information packets you no longer need or that you can easily find on line.
55. All the hotel soaps that you took with you. (And stop taking them. You've got plenty of soap!)
56. The belief that you only have to go through the de-cluttering process once and won't ever have to do it again.
Now, get TOSSING!!
FQ
If you click on the image below it should go to the larger image of my results, which is really cool, go see it if you have time...this was a fun test!
Your Results ... You are Extroverted, Poised, and Outspoken.
Extroverted
- You are ready to talk at the drop of a hat. Whether you're in the office or at a party, you're likely to be found gabbing away in the middle of a group of people.
- You are not shy or unwilling to spend a fair amount of time socializing. People you meet generally do not feel they have a hard time getting to know you.
- You have a high score on the "extroverted" trait, you are among those who enjoy communicating with their friends (on the phone, on line, texting…), hanging out, and finding the best parties.
Poised
- You tend to feel at home wherever you find yourself, even in unfamiliar settings, with new people.
- It takes a lot to rattle you, and when rattled you recover quickly and gracefully.
- You are usually not self-conscious or nervous when you're in an unfamiliar environment or with people you don't know.
Outspoken
- You like to talk. Luckily, you always have something to say, you tell a good story, and people generally enjoy listening to you. It's no wonder that you're often the center of attention.
- You don't tend to keep your thoughts to yourself, and you don't feel you're imposing on others when you share your thoughts and opinions with them.
Warm
- You have a genuine interest in other people. You're a natural host, and are always thinking about how you can increase the happiness of those around you. When friends have problems or are in trouble, you're usually the first person they turn to for aid and comfort.
- You don't always say exactly what you're thinking; you don't like the idea of causing anyone pain because of your criticism.
- Scoring high on the "warm" trait suggests that you are among those who enjoy domestic activities — doing things around the house — and are enthusiastic about charitable work, helping others, and making the world a better place.
Tender
- You are gentle with others, both physically and emotionally. You are careful not to upset people and go out of your way to find the nicest way to say something.
- You naturally focus on the fact that the world is full of wonderful people, places, and things.
- You don't think of yourself as tough-minded or gruff, nor do you need to be seen as some kind of objective source of truth and rationality.
- More often than not, people with a high score on the "tender" trait enjoy spending time with children, love romantic movies, and are enthusiastic about making the world a better place.
Conscientious
- You feel it's important to work according to a plan and finish every task, to do things correctly and thoroughly.
- You are not the kind of person who abandons a project before finishing it, or slacks off when you've lost interest.
Optimistic
- You are a "glass half-full" kind of person, always on the lookout for the silver lining. Your happiness is contagious, which is why others like to be around you.
- You do not feel that the world is an intrinsically depressing place; you are not the kind of "realist" who thinks that only fools find joy in life.
Rash
- You get excited easily, allow yourself to react without censoring your feelings, and sometimes blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.
- You generally don't consider what you're about to say before you open your mouth to speak.
Aesthetic
- You appreciate art, beauty, and design; you know that they are not superficial but absolutely crucial to living the good life.
- You have good taste, and you're proud of it.
- You don't think it's pretentious to be moved by art and beauty. You're not one of those who believe it doesn't matter what something looks like as long as it does its job.
- Those with a high score on the "aesthetic" trait are often employed in literary or artistic professions, enjoy domestic activities — doing things around the house — and are enthusiastic about the arts, reading, and travel.
Competent
- You strive to master everything you undertake. You tend to learn quickly and do not shy away from challenges.
- You are not a "que sera sera" type of person, nor do you go easy on yourself when attempting to master a new skill or get a job done.
Well, that was quite a lot to take in all at once!! But they are all true statements, the good and the bad... You guys go Take the Personality Survey and tell me how it comes out!!
FQ
Hey all...I've been in a bit of a scramble the last few months...summer is hard for me...I love it, it's my favorite season, but I have trouble balancing summer and work, espeially as the new Village Gardener, with that I have been neglecting my own gardens, and have had trouble keeping them up. I walked my yard/gardens yesterday (which in the summer I generally do EVERY day) and realized that some of my plants and flowers had lived their little perenial lives and I missed them completely!! Never even saw a bloom, and they are already spent!! I fear that I am getting into that "too busy" form of life, and I do not want that at all....just now I feel "done!" with gardening, which breaks my heart. I'm not even sure that I sat in my secret garden more than twice this season. Ifeel as if the summer has simply passed me by....I've only been to the beach a handful of times, I have spent a great deal of time with friends and functions..but do feel as if I missed the summer. The family did not take a trip to the amusement park, we did not go to a water park...all the kids had so much to do. We had three or four softball/baseball games a week...and we are already into the soccer season...school begins on Tuesday, and I'm excitrd to have my time alone without the rugrats...but so I might get more work done...kind of sad inside my little head right now...so my blog will be "Tests" for just now...until I can keel myself even, and begin the difficult show season...my first show is next week.....oiy! Now here's something that might surprise you all....
I'm 94% freak!!
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Need to be unique:
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96%
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Need to NOT conform:
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96%
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Willingness to express dissent:
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82%
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Overall score:
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94%
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Your Results
- Need to be unique: You feel that you need to be a VERY unique and different.
- Need to NOT conform: You like to be different than others around you.
- Willingness to express dissent: You speak your mind freely, without giving thought to how others will react.
How do I read my score?
Your scores are percentiles between 1 and 100. The higher the number, the more your personality agrees with the associated comment. Your percentile indicates how you compare against others who have taken this test. Since you have an overall score of 94, this indicates that you have a higher need-for-uniqueness than 93 out of 100 people.
This test was developed by two psychologists in the 1970's to determine an individual's "Need for Uniqueness." It's a real test, based on scientific research, not a so-called purity test like those typically found on the internet.
So....Are You a Freak?
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